Post Traumatic Growth

Post Traumatice Growth

You read the title correctly.  It’s not a typo.  I did not mean to say Post Traumatic Stress nor Post Traumatic Stress Disorder.  You’ve been lied to regarding the effects of trauma. Trauma survivors are far from fragile and damaged.  Yes, something traumatic happened to you, but it’s not who you are.  It doesn’t have […]



Brandi, one of my cyber gurus at Think Tank Designs, sent me an email encouraging me to pen a blog post on suicide.  My hand wavered over the delete key as it’s not a topic I’d normally address.  However, as the day wore on, my thoughts kept circling back.     Before I knew it my innate resistance […]

Beauty Will Save The World


“Beauty will save the world.”  This bold statement was penned by Fyodor Dostoevskh, the dynamic Russian author.  Preposterous?  Hyperbole?  A pipe dream?  Maybe, yet… Acts of beauty quicken our collective soul.  The university student, unarmed, vulnerable, blocking the line of tanks in Tiananmen Square.  Such acts of beauty become seared onto our collective soul. As […]

Called To Evolve

Called to Evolve

“What a man can be, he must be.”  I’ve always gravitated to this quote from Abraham Maslow.  So much so that I’ve modeled much of my work around this concept of evolving – helping a client evolve.  But this evolving is not through heroic acts of discipline and will.  No.  Rather, it is a graceful, […]

Emotional Gravity

Emotional Gravity

As if regular gravity isn’t complex enough (even foo physicists), I had to muddy the waters by introducing what I coined as emotional gravity. Like Newtons gravity, emotional gravity is invisible and constant.  Emotional gravity    is an unpleasant memory that evokes a correspondingly unpleasant emotional state.  Yet it’s far more insidious.  It’s invisible, powerful and can […]

It Matters Not

It Matters Not

I hear it all the time.  Personally I’ve fallen into this seductive trap.  It’s siren call can be compelling.  “She needs to change this about her, then I’ll be happy.  He needs to change this.    If only they’d change this…”  Of course, the list grows and grows.  In truth, it’s an ever-expanding, even endless list.  […]

To Open A Door To Close A Door

Close a Door

I have a tool I rarely use with clients.  I use it with great discretion as it’s so powerful.  There are advanced Neuro-linguistic Programming (NLP) protocols that can help a client say no, and mean it, from the core of their being.  Think of it, being able to close the door to substance abuse, a sexual […]

My Insurance Rant

Insurance Rant

Confidentiality is important.  Nothing good happens without it.  Clients have already experienced trust issues.  The mental health system doesn’t need to add to it.  Enter the two edged sword of insurance. Insurance for counseling sounds great.  Who wouldn’t want help paying for counseling?    The danger is what accompanies insurance.  To receive payment via insurance, your […]

Story Vesus Structure

Turn the Page

More specifically, your personal life story versus how you structure your story in your mind.  Can you guess which one usually wins?  Your story – to your determinant. Your story consists of life experiences and the emotions it generates.  Your structure is how you code the story in your mind.  Herein lies the secret to graceful change.  […]

Dream A Better Dream


Years ago, my granddaughters prevailed upon me to watch a show they were enthralled with, Shark Boy and Lava Girl.  It was delightfully whimsical and great escapism. One scene stuck with me.  A character commented that if you don’t like some aspect of your life, just dream a better dream.  What?!  How could changing something in […]